Friday, March 4, 2011

Wandering Minds

All day I kept thinking there was something missing or wrong as if I had forgotten to do or go somewhere.  I just didn't know what.  It  was a very calm peaceful day with nothing unexpected happening as is usually the case around  this plantation of ours.  I felt anxious as if something was going to happen.  I was alone in the house for most of the day crocheting on a dress for my granddaughter but I just couldn't concentrate.   I kept thinking that maybe I should call someone or talk to somebody but who?  My husband was piddling around outside and would pop in every now and then but I didn't feel like talking to him.  That is so weird. 

While sitting in my office looking out the window at all the bareness of the forest outside it made me sad because thats how I felt.  I know I miss my mom so much sometimes but I know that wasn't what was bothering me.    I just really felt WEIRD. 

Things happen for a reason and Im tired of being the nice guy all the time.  Im tired of always having to compromise so that no one gets their feelings hurt and end up being the fall guy.  I don't like confrontations of any kind and I'd rather give in than argue about something  that really means nothing.  I know there are others who feel this way too, I wonder what they do.  Im just rambling now and so many words are entering my head and I don't know which to put in front of the other.  There is so much I want to say and can't because this blog is not for airing  all my grievances. 

If its the Lord trying to get something through to me I hope he opens up not only my ears but my mind and my heart so I can listen and hear.  My soul cries out Hallelujah!  He's my comfort and my strength in my time of despair.

 I will go to bed now and maybe tomorrow will be different.  

1 comment:

  1. Yesterday was a WEIRD day for me too....when I experience that unrestful feeling in the spiritual, I know it is time to pray. God is coming soon and so many are falling away, perhaps He is trying to get you and I to draw closer to Him so He can use us as intercessors for our loved ones and fellow saints who are simply struggling to make it living for God or who are in need of God and haven't yet surrendered to Him.

    I pray today is a better day for you and that God let's us know or at least gives us peace about the disturbances we are feeling.

    Love you Mama C!!